Wednesday, April 14, 2010

You Are Not Going to Believe This, But...

This one is for Rylee~

We all have someone in our lives that we call first for everything. For me, its my sister Katie.

I know very well that crazy things happen to everyone. Nutty, dumb things are almost a daily occurrence, and I have come to expect it. I'm quite sure every time my number comes up on my sisters phone, she anticipates my out-of-breath description of something that, in her opinion, could only me.

Such was the case a couple of months ago.

I had started the year off in typical "Kristen" fashion: with a case of SHINGLES. Yes, that's right. SHINGLES. For anyone that has ever experienced this, let me tell you: It hurts. Not "labor" hurt, but when the nurse shows you the line of faces from happy to really, really, sad? Shingles will put you damn near the end. I share almost everything, but I told very few people about this. First of all, "shingles" sounds disgusting. It makes you think of really old men with skin that looks like fish scales. (Well, that's what I think of, anyway). They give you some pretty strong meds for this, as well as those pain killers that you reeeeeeaaaaaallly should only take 1/2 a pill daily. It took a lot out of me, and it was a couple of weeks before I felt normal again.

So on my first day back on the road, I was feeling pretty good. It was a bright, sunny day, and I was on my way home. A little tired, but nonetheless, without pain.

I was driving on Route 133 from Winthrop into Livermore, and there was no one on the road but me. I happened to glance to the left, I thought there were snowmobilers or something racing in the field. I was going kind of fast(sorry) and as I got closer, I could see that they were not snowmobilers, but~

TWO HUGE HORSES RACING DOWN THE ROAD! They merged into the road and suddenly were racing along right beside me!! Was I hallucinating? Was I seeing things in the bright, snowy sunlight?
Had the meds made me crazier than ever? Nope. It was really happening.

So there I was, in the Kentucky Derby of my life, neck and neck, speeding along with these two enormous horses! As we raced, I was screaming at them: "What are you doing?!?" What the?! Holy SH#*!" Among other random things. What the hell do you say to two wild, loose horses, that were clearly having the time of their lives?

This went on for at least 1/2 mile. It felt like twenty.

I finally pulled myself together and slowed down to a stop. They slowed right down with me, and as I came to a stop, so did they! One stayed right beside me, so close that if I had rolled down my window, I could have patted him on the head, to say, "Good Race." The other one stood in front of my 4-Runner. I wasn't going anywhere, and neither were they.

Who do I call?


"Whats your emergency?"

ME:"I just raced two horses down 133 in Livermore, and now they won't let me leave!!!"

911: Pause. "UUMMM. What?"


At this point, I finally saw other cars, and they were stopping, too. Thank GOD. I was saved. And thank GOD, too, that there would be other witnesses! Who would believe this story?

The 911 operator then said he was getting other calls about this...Well, YEAH!

The horses finally looked at each other, I swear they looked at me as if to say..."Thanks for the race, SUCKAH." And they trotted side by side back toward the road that they came from.

I turned around and followed them back. I felt a bond with these two crazy fast horses, who were just breaking free for a moment. I wanted to make sure they were safe. I couldn't help thinking: "Good for them."

I could see there was a young girl running with reigns, or whatever, to bring them back to where they belong.

My heart was still racing. The stress of it was clearly going to bring on the shing-dings again. Who do I call about this? Who is going to believe me?

My sister. That's who.

ME:"Katie! You are not going to believe this..."

Katie: "What did you do now..."

And that is how most of my calls to her start.

I started this blog to share with you the crazy things like this that happen, so you can have some idea of what my sister, husband, friends and family go through, and maybe get a laugh.

I think of those horses everyday, whenever I feel like "breaking free." Its one of those things that make me believe that everything happens for a reason.

I wonder what today will bring~

1 comment:

  1. You are really quite good at this writing bit. Though I'm not surprised since your fb statuses are hilarious. :)