It always love it when a moment leaves me speechless. Just when you think you can't be surprised by other peoples actions or words, something happens and you just have no words to utter...
That happens quite a bit around here...and once in a while, even I do something so "crazy," that my kids are even left speechless...momentarily...
Take for example, "THE DIRTY BENCH INCIDENT."
I have a routine in the morning that I cherish. I wake up early, before the kids, get my beloved and very required coffee and sit down to watch the weather. I love the weather report. I really don't care about any other part of the news, sports, entertainment or whatever...I am totally addicted to the weather report. I watch it in the morning, in the evening, and if I make it to 10pm, I watch it then, too. I don't know why. But DO NOT interrupt my weather...
So some days, I hear those beautiful footsteps, that I obviously would never wish away, padding downstairs just as I am taking my first sip..."rats," I can't help thinking. "No quiet time this morning."
"MAAAA-MAAAA! I pooped! And it's a BIIIIIG WUUUUUUUN!"~Tyler will usually sing.
"Mama. Have you seen my hat/baseball socks/ipod?"~Nick.
Off I go.
The nice thing about the weather, its really on every 20 minutes. I like to catch at least one or two full seven day forecasts.
Now, Ty and Mackenzie are like any other siblings. Most of the time they get along great. Playing their own made up games, playing on their scooters or in the backyard...adorable.
But when they fight, they both have the loudest, screechiest, piercing, traffic stopping, blood curdling screams. I cannot stand to hear it.
Especially when my weather report is on.
"MAAA-MAAAA! Kiki took the clean bench!"
"I don't WANT the dirty bench."
The dirty bench.
The kids each have a little bench that they sit on to have snacks at the table in the family room. Mackenzie, my little artist, took it upon herself to "decorate" one of the benches. She wrote her name, drew faces, flowers, butter-slies...you know, "Kiki" things.
But now it has been dubbed by both of them, "THE DIRTY BENCH," and they will fight to the finish to win the honor of sitting on the non-dirty bench.
Usually it ends with me yelling that "it doesn't matter what bench you sit on! JUST EEEEEEAAAAAT!!!!!" Or I reason that since Mackenzie was the dirty culprit, SHE has to suck it up and be the dirty bench sitter.
But when the DIRTY BENCH WAR interrupted my WEATHER REPORT~
MAMA WENT A LITTLE NUTTY.
I stormed up the stairs to find them in full-on-battle.
Without a word, I grabbed both little stools and stormed up to the kitchen where I madly wrote with a black sharpie ALL OVER BOTH BENCHES.
"TYLER'S DIRTY BENCH"
"KIKI'S DIRTY BENCH"
and drew mean faces all over them. I know. Crazy, right?
I calmly walked back downstairs and placed the stools down at the table.
"There. Now they're both dirty."
They both stood there with their mouths open for a good 30 seconds.
I turned around and went back to catch the weather and finish my now cold coffee.
The same two bickering wee-ones, will also be the biggest defender of the other, when faced with an offending Mama.
The other night, during story time, I was witness to a brother's love for his sister.
We were going to have story time on my bed. The kids love that. I guess I do, too.
I gave them both instructions to pick out books that we had not read before. Between ALL of the books they have, plus the books that Nick had when he was little, I would bet that we own almost every childrens story ever written. Including Bambi, which I still refuse to read.
They both came in with smiling faces and climbed up beside me with their selections. Of course, Tyler had picked a large book about construction vehicles (ask me about any excavator, tractor, bucket loader or grater...I bet I can name them all)! And Kiki put a strange looking hardcover book on my lap.
I am not going to say the name of the book, but it had a picture of a young boy, (can I say Eskimo)? And a dog and a wolf and what looked like a massive snowstorm. I didn't get the feeling that this would be anything like a Disney book...but I NEVER guessed how absolutely depressing this "children's" book would be.
It was the story of this young boy who's beloved dog gets killed by a wolf, and spends the whole story dreaming and planning on killing the wolf that killed his dog!
I know, right?!
Well, I started the story, hoping through the entire thing, that it would have this miraculous happy ending, or life lesson that would delight my babies.
UUUUUMMMMM, it did not.
The ending was depressing and a bit confusing, even for me! The kids had listened, hanging on every word through the whole story.
After looking frantically for an alternative ending, I closed the book with a huff.
wtf? I THOUGHT to myself. But I SAID, "WHAT A HORRIBLE BOOK!"
WELL! Mackenzie burst into an all out soap-opera bawling fit.
"MAMA! THAT HURTS MY FEELINGS!" She wailed. Big Tears rolling down her face.
"What hurt your feelings?" I asked. Thinking it was the book that upset her.
"That you didn't like the book that I picked out!"
"Oh! Keek! I didn't mean..."
I turned to hug her and as I did felt a hard thump on the top of my head.
I turned to face Tyler standing up beside me.
HE HAD BONKED ME ON THE HEAD WITH HIS CONSTWUCTION VEEHICOO BOOK!
"What was that for?" I asked, stunned, and rubbing the top of my head.
"You hurt my sistuh's feewings! I am so mad at you, Mama!"
Dirty benches and book-bonks on the head...
Just a couple of moments that have left us speechless at Crazy Road.
Thanks For Reading.